now is the time

"u will never be this young again so why wait? Break free."
very true indeed.
but why cant i break free?
its not like i havent tried.
it just seems to keep haunting me
and infecting everything i do
and im sick of it.
i want to vomit it up and make it all go away
or like in eternal sunshine of the spotless mind.
just erase wotever happened in the past
thatve made me as fucked up as ive gotten.

and once again the words
u dont know wot u got til its gone
echoes in my head.
how come i never get to keep wot i really cherish?
how do i always tend to fuck it up?
why am i never the one thats worth it?
i want to be that one for once
and i want it to be mutual.

why do some tend to never let me go
why dont they just get the point -
leave me be.
they make me feel ashamed.
ashamed about them.
ashamed about me.
ashamed about my past.

i want to move on.
create a future witout all these problems.
let go of everything that used to be.
and now is the time.
it has been for too long now..


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